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Tell a Joke
Discussion - started by MasterSargeant, posted on 9-Nov-20 10:50AM
Ok people, lets share some jokes and have a giggle in these tough times.

Showing comments 1 through 28 out of 28 comments

Comment #1 by MasterSargeant in response to the main topic
Posted on 9-Nov-20 10:56AM
A young lad who was a virgin decided to visit a lady of the night.
On the bed he said, I don't know what to do....she said, well stick a finger in and wiggle it about, which he did.
After a few minutes she said...now put two fingers in...which he did.
Few more minutes went by and she said, now put your whole hand in...he did and said, wow.
Then she said put your other hand in as well...he did as he was told....after a while she said...now clap.
The boy said...I can't to which she replied..Tight aren't I.
Comment #2 by MasterSargeant in response to the main topic
Posted on 9-Nov-20 11:10AM
Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face, and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his weenie today at the playground!" Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut." Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's mom asked, "Really small, was it?" Sally replied, "No, salty." Mom fainted.
Posted on 9-Nov-20 12:12PM
Comment #4 by Whatsthis357 in response to the main topic
Posted on 9-Nov-20 2:19PM
When a crack head dies, are they then a methylated spirit?
Comment #5 by Jimbob101 in response to the main topic
Posted on 10-Nov-20 1:32PM
I was pretty excited when my new girlfriend sent me a text claiming that she loves anal.
Dyslexic bitch, turns out that she loves Alan my best mate...
Comment #6 by Jimbob101 in response to the main topic
Posted on 10-Nov-20 4:02PM
Apple does it again!
Apple announced today that it has developed a breast implant that can store and play music.
The iTit will cost from $499 to $6 depending on cup size and speaker size.
This is cosidered a major social breakthrough because woman are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.
Posted on 10-Nov-20 6:37PM
Comment #8 by Letshavfun in response to the main topic
Posted on 12-Nov-20 12:29PM
A man buys his wife some flowers and takes them home to her. When she sees them she says "I suppose I have to spread my legs for those" He replies No, it's ok, I'll get a vase for them
Comment #9 by Cheekies in response to the main topic
Posted on 16-Nov-20 8:47PM
Here's a joke:

Guy contacts woman says hey lets meet I'll be in your city let's have drinks and let whatever happen, happen.

Guy messages daily all is good in the hood.

Guy messages day before leaving - woman responds amicably. Guy makes no contact until after 8pm that evening, expecting the woman to wait around for his site text. Note the guy did not want to exchange digits.

Guy messages a couple of times then posts his situation in a discussion casting his net wider. When woman sees post she sends him a message to say good luck to you. Guy ghosts and blocks her. End of Joke 😅🤣😂
Comment #10 by palmyguy in response to Cheekies ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 8:51PM
The guy is the joke.

Sorry he let you down. His loss imho
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:05PM
Ditto plamyguy
What wrong with these people!
All the best Cheekies, I'm sure there must be some genuine guys out there somewhere.
Comment #12 by Cheekies in response to palmyguy ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:07PM
it was funny nonetheless - One can never take things personally. Personal investment is something that you can't get back.
Comment #13 by Seymour in response to the main topic
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:27PM
An old woman walked into a dentist's office, took off all her clothes, and spread her legs. The dentist said, "I think you have the wrong room." "You put in my husband's teeth last week," she replied. "Now you have to remove them."
Comment #14 by Cheekies in response to Seymour ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:36PM
good one hahahaha :)
Comment #15 by Seymour in response to Cheekies ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:39PM
What do you call an IT teacher who touches his students? A PDF file!
Comment #16 by Cheekies in response to Seymour ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:41PM
PDF even hahahaha locked that format in
Comment #17 by Seymour in response to Cheekies ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:44PM
How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from!
Comment #18 by Cheekies in response to Seymour ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:51PM
Euwww thats cringey 😷😬
Comment #19 by Seymour in response to Cheekies ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 9:52PM
Last one......What do you call a smiling Roman soldier with a piece of hair stuck between his front teeth? A glad-he-ate-her.
Comment #20 by Cheekies in response to Seymour ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 10:03PM
much better than the tampon one hahahaha
Comment #21 by Seymour in response to Cheekies ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 10:08PM
OK YOU have twisted my arm second to last one....A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!" The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!
Comment #22 by Cheekies in response to Seymour ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 10:25PM
nice one 😂🤣😅 I did laugh at that one :)
Comment #23 by Seymour in response to Cheekies ( view post )
Posted on 16-Nov-20 10:33PM
Last one I promise(nice ass by the way)What's the difference between your boyfriend and a condom? Condoms have evolved: They're not so thick and insensitive anymore.
Comment #24 by Jimbob101 in response to the main topic
Posted on 18-Nov-20 11:23AM
My wife said she was leaving me because I always exagerate.
I was so shocked I almost tripped over my cock!
Comment #25 by Bobbythrush in response to the main topic
Posted on 30-Nov-20 4:14PM
What are the cheapest balls, bear balls or deer balls?

Deer balls, they are just under a buck.
Comment #26 by Jimbob101 in response to the main topic
Posted on 1-Dec-20 11:45AM
A woman was in town on a shopping trip.
She began her day finding the most perfect shoes in the first shop and a beautiful dress on sale in the second. In the third everything had just been reduced by 50 percent when her mobile phone rang.
It was a female doctor notifying her that her husband had just been in a terrible car accident and was in critical condition in the ICU.
The woman told the doctor to inform her husband where she was and that she'd be there as soon as posible.
As she rung up she realized she was leaving what was shaping up to be her best day ever in the boutiques. She decided to get in a couple more shops before heading to the hospital.
She ended up shopping the rest of the morning, finishing her trip with a cup of coffee and a beautiful slice of chocolate cake, compliments of the last shop. She was jubilant.
Then she remembered her husband. Feeling guilty she dashed to the hospital.
She saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about her husband's condition. The lady doctor glared at her and shouted, You went ahead and finished your shopping trip didn't you! I hope you're proud of yourself!
While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself in town, your husband has been languishing in the intensive care unit! It's just as well you went ahead and finished because it will more than likely be the last shopping trip you ever take!
For the rest of his life he will require round the clock care.
The woman felt so guilty she broke down and sobbed.
The lady doctor chuckled and said I'm just pulling your leg. He's dead.
Show me what you bought.
Comment #27 by farmer2512 in response to the main topic
Posted on 1-Dec-20 1:41PM
An 60 your old accountant sent a letter to His wife.
The letter reads, Dear wife I am going to spend the weekend with my 21 year old secretary in the hotel just out side of town. On reading this his year old wife wrote a letter back to him.
Dear husband I am going to spend the weekend at the hotel in town with my year old gardener. And husband you being an accountant will know that gos into more times that go's into .
Comment #28 by farmer2512 in response to the main topic
Posted on 1-Dec-20 1:42PM
60 year old wife

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