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Discussion - started by Tasty1, posted on 4-May-24 7:20AM
So there's a lot of debate in other threads about what constitutes cheating, so I thought I'd start one specifically for it.
Personally, I won't sleep with married men unless they're part of a couple. I think the old excuse "she doesn't put out anymore" is just that, an excuse, and it's probably intimacy she needs before she wants to. And beyond that, if it's a complete breakdown of the relationship why do people stay in it instead of just leaving?

Showing comments 1 through 40 out of 40 comments

Comment #1 by hornycouple in response to the main topic
Posted on 4-May-24 7:43AM
I have found women are no different to men they cheat just as much i have had that experience many times
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Posted on 8-May-24 3:56PM
Posted on 8-May-24 4:14PM
Joining you in the gallery with my own popcorn 🍿🍿
This could be good 🤣🤣
Posted on 8-May-24 4:17PM
Comment #10 by Biguycrom in response to the main topic
Posted on 8-May-24 5:00PM
All very subjective and it comes done to individuals morals and standards.
Have fun is my motto.
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Comment #16 by cuddly-one in response to the main topic
Posted on 9-May-24 3:20PM
The amount of married men who messaged me asking to meet up for the one reason and they don't like being told what they're doing is wrong now pretty much given up on meeting somebody decent on here.
Woman seemed to have 3 or 4 guys on the go at a time though so it's not just married men but women playing the field.
Posted on 9-May-24 8:05PM
What's right or wrong is purely subjective and up to everyone to make their own moral choices.

Society does have some accepted norms, probably based on historical religious beliefs but they are changing rapidly.

Posted on 9-May-24 11:59PM
Totally agree with you there. Each to their own and society in general seems to have an opinion (judgement) about other people's choices but so long as it's not affecting us personally then it's nobody else's business. We've all had choices to make in life and some of them are not necessarily the right ones at the time but then we only have ourselves to answer to.
Posted on 10-May-24 6:13AM
What a great answer well thought out
Posted on 10-May-24 3:04PM
Yeah yeah morals standards and opinions,my partner has medical health issues and although my beautiful cutie bootie has given her blessing permission whatever you want to call it for me to play away..... it didn't come with a bloody doctor's note did it
Comment #21 by Keenbeen in response to the main topic
Posted on 11-May-24 10:19AM
Well said , a lot of people stay in a relationship because it’s the easier option but your dead right, if you want to play around you should move on
Comment #22 by Tasty1 in response to Keenbeen ( view post )
Posted on 11-May-24 4:11PM
That's what I reckon.
Posted on 11-May-24 5:11PM
Well put
Comment #24 by Jss003 in response to the main topic
Posted on 11-May-24 6:47PM
Most of the discussion (moralising actually) is by those who believe that their own view of morality is absolute and absolutely correct. No nuance, no interest in determining context, indeed, no curiosity. Just a sanctimonious do it my way approach to life and how others should lead theirs. We'd all be better off if fewer fingers were pointed at other people's habits and opinions and more time spent enjoying the site. (And yes, I'm well aware of the irony in my final sentence or two.
Comment #25 by Davidbutler in response to Jss003 ( view post )
Posted on 11-May-24 7:19PM
‘Sanctimonious’. THAT was the word I was looking for. Thank you.
No nuance, no context. It’s so damned easy to point a finger and slap on a label without knowing what the hell you’re talking about.
Who has the right to do that to anyone?
Posted on 11-May-24 8:20PM
Don't be mean guys can still be uninhibited but ethical,..... boom, there you go "ethicallyunihibited"! Put it in the oxford
Posted on 12-May-24 7:21AM
Well said. Such an opinionated, judgemental society we live in today.loving someone doesn't necessarily mean sex is the most important part of a relationship so sex with someone else is just that,sex.especially if your partner doesn't have the same sex drive or open-mindedness or kinky desires as the other.
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Comment #29 by sherloch in response to the main topic
Posted on 12-May-24 12:29PM
Playing together with others would be fine as well as apart, I think, with the necessary permission/pass.
Comment #30 by manslut74 in response to Tasty1 ( view post )
Posted on 13-May-24 3:47AM
Cannot agree. I enjoy my wife's company greatly otherwise but, when it comes to sex she sadly chooses to be a bad joke: she can be the greatest but very rarely is. Nevertheless, why should I give up the rest of her just because she insists on inadequacy in bed?
Comment #31 by Tasty1 in response to sherloch ( view post )
Posted on 13-May-24 12:06PM
I totally agree, if all parties agree, I believe as adults we should be able to have these conversations and if not then why not? And cheating isn't just about sex, cheating can be emotional too.
Comment #32 by Tasty1 in response to Davidbutler ( view post )
Posted on 14-May-24 8:38AM
I don't believe any of this conversation has been pointing fingers, I merely started with my own position on the matter and was genuinely interested in the responses it got. I believe people will do whatever they choose and i will do the same. If anyone is feeling like they are being pointed at then perhaps it is their own guilt?
Comment #33 by Davidbutler in response to Tasty1 ( view post )
Posted on 14-May-24 10:45AM
You’re right. Most of this conversation - now - isn’t about pointing fingers. Mostly because the conversation is a shadow of its former self. About one third has been ‘clobbered”, so commenting on it after such heavy editing is bring a highly slanted point of view.
Re-reading your initial post, it is a highly contentious one and one would therefore expect some contentious debate.
It is easy to comment on how others SHOULD live within their own relationships, or SHOULDN’T stay in it if they want to have extra-mural relationships. But by the very nature of those comments, we are in absolutely NO position to comment, because it is none of our business.

Unless you have been, or lived in a situation like that - especially for a male as you have highlighted him specifically- no one has any idea of the emotional or mental position it places a man. I know, as I’ve been there.

Simply up and leaving isn’t as easy as that.

Posted on 14-May-24 12:39PM
Well said
Comment #35 by Mike-OcksHard in response to the main topic
Posted on 14-May-24 5:14PM
That's great you have your opinion based on your world views. We all have our own perception of how we think things should be. We also should be accepting people can have far different, and even opposing, views to our own.

Myself personally, I've been cheated on and it never bothered me. We have a saying here, it doesn't matter where we get our appetite from as long as we always eat at home. Which to us means have sexual freedom but don't ever fall for the other person and always come home for love.
Comment #36 by Tasty1 in response to the main topic
Posted on 14-May-24 5:59PM
So, if my initial post was read properly, I stated MY PERSONAL stand on sleeping with a married person, and then asked for the opinions of others. I have not pointed fingers, judged anyone's decision making or the way they live their lives. I understand relationships are complicated and what goes on behind closed doors nobody really knows, which is why I asked the question, an opportunity for some explanations to perhaps help us all understand why people cheat(emotionally as well as physically) and what people consider to be cheating. Some people, note I'm not saying MEN, may believe a kiss is cheating, some may think less or more is cheating. That's why it's called a discussion.
Comment #37 by Jubilation in response to Tasty1 ( view post )
Posted on 14-May-24 7:17PM
It wasn't an unreasonable question. I guess the learning from this thread is that some questions, however reasonable, are just too provocative.
Posted on 14-May-24 9:23PM
I think in a sense you’re quite right - the discussion is provocative and therefore going to throw up a raft of emotion; trigger evocative response. Unfortunately with discussions on a site where it’s the written word, the subtle nuance of discussion, body language and intonation is lost, leaving the post open to misinterpretation.
It is, however, a great topic. The boards have become so lack-lustre and about as interesting as watching paint dry. So kudos for putting it out there, Tasty.
It is also an exercise in capturing a point of view as clearly as possible, then sharing it.
Comment #39 by Tasty1 in response to Davidbutler ( view post )
Posted on 15-May-24 10:07AM
Thankyou, that was my only intention, I had no desire to make people feel judged. And so we learn....
Posted on 18-May-24 9:07PM
I think at the end of the day for me personally I'm glad I got out of my comfort zone in some situations earlier in life when I was trying to come to terms about why I was attracted to both men and women and could've easily locked it away and never explored but although some of it was confusing especially when society teaches us to follow their vision of normal. Exploration is the key to understanding oneself and knowing what that is is the key to happiness. Nobodies perfect and we all make mistakes from time to time but learn from it and move find someone that as a partner has the same open minded erotic ideas as each other and both enjoy the same things is hard to find without there being any jealousy etc.

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